My Life in Me-Me's

Total Recall

Hey Fam!
I wrote this a while ago. I was debating whether or not to share this but decided to throw caution to the wind. (You know I love my me-me's!) I dedicate this post to the Chairman. Baby, this love is UNBREAKABLE!

I was excited beyond that day. I recall standing next to my father in the church lobby after exiting the white limousine. I linked my arm in his, and the church doors were opened. My bridesmaids and flower girls had gone before me walking into ‘Love Lifted Me” by Angella Christie. (Now that woman can play a sax!) As my hostesses stood opening the double doors, I was shocked to see a fully packed sanctuary – the familiar faces of friends, family, and church members. “Oh my God, Daddy. Look at all these people” I whispered to my father. A paralyzing nervousness over took me; I couldn’t move. I felt as though my dad was holding me up during that moment because I could not feel my feet. I clutched my bouquet in my left hand and held on to Daddy with my right hand as if I was holding on for dear life. Tears fell from eyes as we slowly took steps down the aisle that was lined with the white runner that I purchased not many days ago.

The smiling faces of the congregation morphed into a blur through my tears. “I am so nervous, Daddy”, I whispered to my ever-sympathetic father. “Take your time, girl”, he said with that reassuring tone that I had grown up with for the past 25 years. I felt as though we were floating as we moved to the processional music – a tune by Allen & Allen specifically chosen by myself and my beloved fiancé.

They say “you only get one trip down the aisle”, this was finally my turn! Someone actually loved me in spite of all my faults and idiosyncrasies, I was about to become someone’s wife. The days of my independent, free-wheeling singlehood were now over. The moment was bittersweet. See, I had been a bridesmaid in at least a half a dozen weddings wondering when my turn would come. At those weddings, I recall being genuinely happy for the couple and at the same time, so sad for myself. I rejoiced because those brides before me had found the loves of their life. Yet I was sad within myself because I had not found that special person. When was I going a ring? When was I going to wear a white gown and approach a handsome groom? Although I was content being single for the most part, these questions would plague me. I grew restless of men who were either too immature or unwilling to commit to me in a real way. When was it going to be my turn? Today, August 26th was my day - finally! This realization was too overwhelming for me and I experienced a strange mix of anticipation and anxiety.

I began to calm down as I spotted my fiancé smiling with his best man and groomsmen in cue. The joy on his face and cool confidence then extinguished my eruption of emotions. As I took his hand, calmness washed over my soul like cooling water. I was finally with the man I had waited for my entire life. My dear Daddy kissed my cheek and sat next to my beaming mother as the ceremony began. “Dearly beloved…..”

posted by SandyBaby @ Monday, October 16, 2006